Relationship vs Friendship

Have you wondered why you loved sharing your Tiffin with your bench mate in kindergarten? Always enjoyed the school excursions, which you went in your high school, along with your friends. Wondered why you never bunked college and went for a movie with your brother but with your friends gang? Enjoyed the office dinner more when you sat next to your friends; though sitting next to your boss helped build your image.

Relationships are formed the day we are born. We have parents, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts the day we are born. It’s a package deal and no bargain allowed. Then, there is a bit of a choice possible when you plan to bring in a new relationship into your life in the form of spouse. But till this date the candidate is scrutinized, cross examined and dissection by your family before the relationship becomes a reality

Once you ( or more likely your entire khandhan) decides who the (un)lucky soul will bear this new avatar of being spouse...then comes another stock of relationships which are bound by the law , Father in Law, Mother in Law, Sister in Law, Brother in Law and what not. So choices are very few in a relationship. Thanks to modern law some may end up in a divorce but still the relationship sticks on...as ex hubby / ex wife and a lot of others EX …Bottom-line choices in relationship = zero.

The lovely thing about friendship obviously is you get to choose. I dint have much of a choice in kindergarten. My neighbor at the class became my best friend. But I always had the choice of being a friend or not being a friend :-). But then, at least one neighbor became my friend. This continued till my early days in primary school. It slowly changed and I soon had friends from other benches and then other sections. Wow! the world is so different when you ride the imagination horse with your friend. Even mugging for exams becomes easy. You can conquer the world when your friend is with you.

But then there are these silly fights you have with your friend and the whole world comes to a naught. Soon the power to make a choice hijacks our brains and we decide to junk some very good friendships. The bond that developed over ten / twenty / thirty years become pain. Trust, honesty, transparency disappears over night.

Is it why god gave us little choice in relationships?? When will we learn the power of making choices and value the friendships we have??